


The Adventures of Beare Browne

by TheDarkMetalLady



Category: Bear on a Tractor
Genre: Action, Adventure, Crack, Gen, Humor, written while loopy from sleep deprivation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:00:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24308593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkMetalLady/pseuds/TheDarkMetalLady
Summary: Beare Browne just wanted to live a normal life. Then he bought a tractor.
Kudos: 2





	The Adventures of Beare Browne

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a series of ideas from [Christopher Bowes at the Organ](https://www.twitch.tv/christopherbowes) livestreams a few weeks back. Writing was started at approximately 1 AM after 1.5 L of coffee a few hours prior in an attempt to finish an essay. 
> 
> Do I need to keep saying this? Clearly, I do. **This story is NOT RPF. It focuses on fictional characters created by the crazy, crazy man that is Chris Bowes. Any similarities to real life do not immediately mean that I am writing about a real-life person.** Rant over, thank you. 
> 
> Enjoy the story!

It was a nice, warm, sunny morning in the town of Port Royal, Tennessee. The sun was slowly making its way up the horizon as the rooster crowed and every creature in the area began to awaken from their respective slumber (except for the nocturnal creatures, who were currently trying to catch some Zzzzs and did not appreciate the rudeness of the roosters). 

In his home, Beare Browne stretched before getting up from his humble hay bed in his humble home. He had only recently moved into town -- after all, it was very difficult to buy a home among humans when one didn't speak their language and had so much more fur than them and had such sharp claws that weren't too well-suited for holding a pen to sign legal documents he could barely read. 

The opportunity had come quite suddenly, actually. Beare Browne had been napping in a forest when a very frantic man had tripped over him, waking him. Naturally, Beare hadn't been too impressed. Had he been like his half-brother, Baer Redde, or any of the other bears, he likely would have eaten the rude human as food. However, where others would have only seen a meal, he had seen opportunity, for the human was a man of many talents, including but not limited to a law degree and real estate. 

Using what he knew of the human hand language, he had told the human what his greatest dream was -- to actually own land, land of his own, and to be able to grow his own cute little carrots and cucumbers and other types of adorable veggies. The human agreed quickly when told the bear would spare him from being eaten, though he had warned Beare that it would be difficult to find a good property when Beare didn't have any of the green leaves humans used to trade. 

Beare hadn't seen the problem, of course -- why, he could go to one of those fancy buildings and get some instantly! But, the human had talked him out of it, saying that it would make getting land harder or something. 

Then, fortune struck again! There was some bit of land that the humans feared, because it stank within the den built on it, and they wanted to be rid of it at all costs. Once Beare learned of that, he got his human to arrange everything immediately. Finally, finally he'd have land of his own among humans!

Why, Beare didn't understand what all the fuss was about with the den -- there was only a slightly-spoiled meal under the floorboards, that's all. Sure, the den could use some work to make it better, but he didn't mind. He could make it his own!

Beare was a very happy bear to have his own home. 

And so, despite how early it was and how he usually had slept in before he had his home, Beare woke up feeling happy and ready to face the day. 

As he got up, he made a plan. First, he needed to eat, as he had leftovers that were threatening to go stale. Then, he had to go gather some crops and head into town to trade them for thin green leaves, then use the leaves to buy more seeds. Oh! And he'd use the time to learn more about humans, too. (The more he learned, the more he realized they were so fascinating!) Then, he would return home, plant the seeds, and put some mighty good fertilizer on them thanks to his large breakfast. 

As he got his breakfast ready, he heard a tiny voice say from the shelf. 

"Good morning, Beare!"

He turned around and gave a roar in greeting, then approached the shelf and gently picked up little Carrottee the Carrot and set her on his shoulder. Carrottee was his primary companion in his new home -- he had saved her from a cruel fate at the jaws of a human the day after he got his new home, and she has been with him ever since. 

"I see you're feeling happy today!" Little Carrottee chimed, settling on Beare's shoulder as Beare got his leftovers from dinner out from under a loose floorboard. 

Beare grunted in response and lifted a paw to carefully pet Carrottee, then went back to making his food. 

"What is the plan for today?" Carrottee asked cheerfully.

Beare grunted a few times, then gestured. 

"Ooo, you're getting new seeds? That's wonderful!" Carrottee exclaimed. "Maybe Cucu will finally stop being such a sourpus once he has more friends."

"I am not a sourpus," came a protest from the top shelf. 

Beare grunted and rolled his eyes. 

Carrottee just giggled. "Whatever you say, sour Cucu!"

"Stop calling me Cucu! I am Cuculumbus Giganticus the Great Cucumber, and don't you forget it!"

Beare didn't even bother responding to that beyond with another roll of his eyes as he ate his meal. After all, he had a busy day ahead of him -- one he shouldn't waste on typical petty arguing with Cucu, no matter how entertaining it was. (Though he didn't participate in the conversation, that didn't mean he didn't listen as Carrottee kept chatting away, which eventually shifted from the topic of Cucu's name to discussing plans for the day.)

After the meal, Bearre set Carrottee down on her shelf before going to the fields to do some work and then to the pond to wash off, much to Carrottee's sadness since she so enjoyed perching upon his shoulder. However, after two past incidents -- one involving Carrottee falling in the fields and another involving a panicked dive into the pond at the edge of the property on Beare's part when poor little Carrottee had accidentally fallen in last time when Beare was washing off, followed by Beare barely managing to save her from some of the bad mean fish in the pond -- Beare didn't want to take any chances like that again, at least for the time being. 

Once he was done working and clean, Beare ran around a bit to shake off the worst of the water that still clung to his fur. Then, he headed into his home den, where he used one of those human fabric things called twols or something to finish drying off more. Then, once sufficiently dry (and his twol sufficiently wet), he got on some of the human-style cloths he had. (The human who had helped him get a house had also helped him find and trade for the fabric cloths, too. It was absolutely ingenious how the humans had these cloths in so many sizes, ranging from those meant for little cubs to those meant for creatures larger than Beare.)

Now ready to face town, he put Carrottee in the pocket of his upper fabric cloth thing, so she could peek out and see town while also remaining safe. With that, he headed out. 

**Author's Note:**

> I have no clue how long this story will be or what turns it will take, so don't ask me that. It exists. That is all.


End file.
